I'm living in a foreign country as an au pair at the moment. I don't think I've ever been fatter than I am right now and I fucking hate hate hate it. I don't even look cute at all. The clothes I have don't even fit. I can't even look cute for all the foreign boys I'm meeting . It's just full on disgusting really. Some days I've started to not eat again. Others, I eat chocolate bars all day. Today is one of those chocolate bar days.
I want to come back. I want to be the skinny me that I made it to. Before I come home to the US in December, I need to be fucking skinny again and make everyone even more jealous. I need it.
Also, where did everyone else go.....? It's empty here now.
