I've never felt like this..

At this point, I hate myself. I don't remember feeling this low and worthless ever before in my life. Every little thing I do is a huge struggle for me. Even writing this post feels like it is sucking the last of my energy right out of me. That's why I haven't posted in so long. The only dream I have ever had in my life is no longer happening. (I've always wanted to go away to college; I got in to the college I wanted to go to; we apparently don't have enough money). I am a fat piece of shit who has eaten A LOT allllll weekend. Plus, not even one thing I've eaten has been healthy. (at least the people at my work aren't on to me anymore).

I weighed myself earlier today wearing clothes/after eating and I was 111.4. Eww. Anything over 109 feels like the end of the world to me.

Tomorrow, I will eat healthy and get down to AT LEAST less than 109. I'm sure my fat ass can do that.
I keep raising my standards and that's not a good thing.

Sorry about not writing back to people's comments. I can hardly bring myself to write this post, let alone comment people back. I'm going to though, soon enough. I have been reading everyone's blogs everyday. I haven't forgotten about you! I just srsly am having some major depression-like things going on right now.

I'm still not skinny for prom..........it's in 2 weeks. Fml.